cheap chocolate

dont know how many of us can differentiate between a cheap chocolate and an expensive one by merely looking at it perhaps the difference does not lie in the looks there are other vulgarities as well for there is texture, colour, shine and several other what so what so nots that are so well hidden from half dumb people like me. one argument thats so often put is to why let the temptation melt while i am unjustly sharpening my skills and on the reverse i am too scared of entering the murky waters of making judgments more so when i do have a poor track record. Another way could be who likes to make judgments when you are already tempted beyond irreconcilable truth but then bitter taste hurts and i dont agree with the idea of carrying a bitter mouth with so little saliva to fiddle with ........

Preview

drop the city...

Until almost the very end i didnt realize that the magic was much hyped and faded...
recently visited this city of two names benaras..... While treading the streets i couldnt feel a single stir when in fact while waiting i could always feel the thunder beneath..... The city does not belong to me it seldom talked and i was ill at ease....long narrow curvaceous the streets were thin but i never missed a beat ....dont know what went wrong but surely it wasnt an anticipated reaction...may be the city never opened its arms for me or may be i wasnt willing to take the bait...whatever visiting her was an unsatisfying experience and somehow i deserved better..

together apart !

a sort of semi-ironic refrain brought from nothing that always existed. It’s like a well founded
fear that's soaked, imbued and then assimilated. hmmmm part of the system and now flows
in the blood. More than a touch of exotic nihilism, a divine intervention with the sole motive of constant crawling in the brain... sceptical, cynical, and ready to devour............but then nothing is left.......there has never been anything to satiate its hunger. so even after being born healthy its blemished, ravaged, angry at the unhealthy attitude of the host. Let there be a war one is to one
and let the host be destroyed so that eventually it may reach the I.

I have a right to carry this "I" for one it belongs to me don’t know why it no longer suffice my world.
I am angry, bruised and my me is swollen.....there is no hope because my I no longer stands with me and by my side...it has become distant and i no longer long for it....
Don’t know if my infidelity hurts it but i mourn its absence .....many happy wonderful days we
have spend together...memory of good days no longer hurts ....its baked and solidified, taken the shape of a rock well above the ground to make any one fall that steps at the edges. It could have
been wonderful if this could be preserved like a distant star still bright and shinning like the stars of every one else so that one could hold the membership of some fraternity at least without "I" I could belong to somebody or to some club, society or club and could fill the patches and make existence some coherent piece of cloth to wrap around when it snows in the winter of life.......

me at large.......

....never written a blog and never intended to.........it was an absurdity to an extent and it still is but then i need a vent ......if you dont like it dont tell me....i already know........i just have to barf..........not left with enough people..so writting for everyone willing to read......those who have time to read peoples absurdity.....let it be a floating float with nothing attached to it.............